Saturday, August 13, 2016

Family relationships

Watch deeply the following Q&A session video on family relationships.

The followings are the key phrases excerpted from the video.

< Key phrases >

The first thing to do will be first to connect with yourself and to find the two other's relationships with yourself.

Write a letter to your mother from two parts of you (a little child and a beautiful young woman of today). 

If you want to reestablish your connection, when you feel ready, just send a few words on a card and you just sign.

It takes patience and trust and (?). But it's possible, and you will. So, we have many, many friends and practitioners who were able to reestablish communication. Even if the communication is broken for many, many, many, many years, it's possible. So, good luck!

(My commentary)
The answer by a nun was very good. But I feel that more detailed explanation is necessary. My answer would be followings.

In order to restore the communication with family members, that person needs to heal oneself first. That's because without healing oneself it's impossible to heal others. If we keep suffering, we have nothing to offer to others. That's why Thay said, "The way out is in." Before going out to others, we must go into ourselves and understand the root cause of our own suffering through deep looking

And before looking deeply into our suffering, we need to revive awareness (true self) through mindfulness. That's because only awareness can recognize the suffering, embrace it, relieve it, look deeply into it, understand the root cause, generate compassion and transform it to joy and happiness by the energy of compassion. If you are ego (separate self) and think, you can never achieve these steps.

If you (awareness) keep looking deeply into your suffering, you will attain insight of your wounded inner child and of what had happened in your childhood. That insight will show you the reason why you have been suffering for a long time. So, you will understand everything and feel that there is no wonder why. Once you understand the root cause, you can liberate yourself from your suffering through transformation. And you will be able to accept yourself unconditionally.

Then you will be ready to approach to your family members to restore communication for the reconciliation. If you practice the exactly the same thing to your family members through the loving speech and deep listening, there will be a good chance for reconciliation. But the issue is that even if you are ready, your family members may not be ready. So, you may need to be patient and wait for them to be ready.

(Cf.) “Unconditional Love” Now Available at Amazon!

Thay's calligraphy

No comments:

Post a Comment